This is how Shiz was feeling after the aliens from Planet *X! departed in their flying saucer they did not stay long
This is what Shiz remembers:
They spoke in tougues aaarrgh so she filled their flying saucer with "c'ardonay". They switched to Ozzie, oh Shiz went. "Take me to your leader" the 3 tiny green aliens said jumping out of the liquid.
Shiz replied: "We don't have any. We have money counters oh and I have Noni who, when not in her cage, is bat shit crazy and a charity case.
The main leader has direct conversations with horses, he is called Mr Ed. He rifles his money and plays with lots of budgies. In Ancient Rome all were counting with tiny figures in tiny columns most everybody was a horse trader then though some replicants existed from the present in the temple where they counted.
They don't care about us mares think you can run a nation like an ass. Never listen to crows, that is why maggies never started anything creative. Noni did listen to one and did not buy an apartment, now she has only a lair.
Besides a nation of animals is not a trade it is a pride of lions who are hungry, then there is land, water forests and bats who cannot vote and are NOT shareholders rather part of Planet Earth living biosphere. It is hideous as Planet Earth iz a zinking ark" Shiz converted to horse talk "yet ve all love culture, Horse Whisperers support organised criminal activities that are legal on a massive scale and are the ghostly undead lugging lumps of coal, they tweet and conduct forced labour for "consumers" a new term to explain we are not horses, we are users instead but I am not a "user" and nor is HK we are horses. Mum is as she is on crack boo hoo. Shiz wondered if we still stocked The Artist's Brain in the galeria, kult followers know along with Dog Faced Man and the Victorian Skull Twins.
The aliens saw that Shiz was toiling. She said she had been unemployed for so long she was employed on Holy Kitsch! stable under bondage and it was not enough still to pay for hay so she lives on crackers. "The stables gets a kickback and the slaughterhouse so now I am in a harness. I am ready for the glue factory. I have no papers I am only 16, papers are expensive. I have no dinero for art school I would have to learn to paint for "Family Values" Noni failed to find the Bachelor I found one when I galloped free.
Mum and Dad lost their jobs as handsome horses are unneeded if all you want are new expressways for homies. Dad was totally desperate and marginalised he’s an expert at minting money for the Arts so not needed here at all as the Arts is disinterested in raising money at all, it is more usual abroad to money raise for the Arts as a career path and trade. So to impress Mum decided to become a drug mule so he could buy a WRX car to go hooning on the new tracks have "A Day at the Races" but he was caught overseas after the police tipped them off for a kick back and now he has a life sentence, boo hoo."
"As for Mum she could not get a job either as she prefers coal dust not to infect her lungs, museo work is in short supply they are aiming populist rather than Deep Culture. She does hysterical Mexican oil painting restoration work, a very low demand job in Oz. She visited #Centreofhopelessness they cracked up and said this will bring you down several notches you are the same as us, we are all the same here, nobody is different. She became super depressed so she had to go to the new govt initiative #DepartmentofGloomprevention for people who are marginalised and feel hopeless, she also said she wanted to climb a tree as Dad was banged up for life. They could not find a spare tree so Mum went away then started taking crack.
The dole is not enough to live on so she is taking crack to forget she is on the dole and feeling hopelessly behind in the protection racket, ahem rent. Then Mum started breaking into houses to support herself and her newly acquired crack habit and the stand over man ahem, landlord's extortion racket to forget about trees and the dole and Dad being arrested overseas for drug smuggling.
My grandmother couch surfs. She had no Super as she was a traditional housewife her hubby died young from a high pressure pixelated job. Granny cannot live well on the pension so now her horse life feels soo long rather than short odds. She told this to #Centreofhopelessness in person as she cannot use a computer and they do not answer the phone even though they have a number. Granny does not smoke, she takes trips.
They told her to attend #DepartmentofGloomprevention and had she tried #artastherapy to see if that could help her. It did not as same as learning to use a computer or jump hurdles it is only for certain ponies and there are no trees for her to climb. Holy Kitsch! did make her at least neigh again but Holy has no spare couches so when she left she once again visited #DepartmentofGloomprevention to seek their advice on couches and trees.
Mum's brother became so anxious he shut himself in a dark cellar watching mad warrior computer games and weird shit he self mutilated he felt hopeless and afraid of the light, people started to disappear when they dropped by, the police were called due to this odd phenomena, they found minced guests in the freezer, now he has to attend the #DepartmentofGloomprevention so he will not mutilate others ever again though self-mutilaters do not usually molest others as he has done so I think HAL is to blame, he has been locked away to protect the public.
Mum no longer shops for beautiful pieces she just does crack and sometimes buys slave labour Deal of the Day from billionaire multi nationals on line if trruuly desperate. I think she might be caught by the pigs soon" said Shiz "Holy Kitsch! is Kult with giant sparkle skulls with satellites" HK is weird and should be arrested."
Shiz exclaimed as she scrubbed the pisos on her hands and knees, after rubber stamping bags in prayer position. "I work like a horse, all is deadlines, the clocks melted from tight turnarounds. Noni makes me look hideous and be hideous for her paintings, they were merely click bait. I agree with the academy they are examples of a down trodden poorly liberated woman. I cannot take this rubberised torture any longer" tears rolled down her cheeks onto the floor, plip plop.
Holy nobbled in weeping inconsolably, said she had just fried and wanted her Bondage returned though there were no laws to protect her from shysters who kept inching in negotiations, it is not a level playing field. She has now lost $$$ to gangland operators, cartel competitors, sharks, Shiz who is more sullen than Gaugin’s Tahitian wife and $$$ to her niece, hi Chenoa.
There is a blackmail dept run by the State for meowing they employ toothless tigers it is called the Ombudscat for commercial tenancies. You pay for the service and they just meow. That is it, there are no laws to protect the meek it does not force the extortionist to fess up to gouging, coercion, usury and money siphoning. They are a pack of schunts too.
This porcelain teapot is a gift from Chinese Government, btw Shiz is part Japanese, as a matter of diplomacy to the Ombudsman Dept, NSW describing current situation well. They are joining for a herbal tea as that is all the dept does is have tea, it does not enforce anything at all even when you pay them $700, all they do is talk as they have no legal teeth with any matters at all they were removed by Berejeklian in secret even though I was unfairly inched and under duress with most recent lease. So this is from one set of mandarins to another. Better than the aboriginal anatomical kangaroo to India recently gifted by NSW State Govt as Indians are Hindu and find it offensive to eat meat duh, some research first on choice would assist. Wonder why China white, a slang term in USA for drugs do not know as to China it's also a water colour, I could drink a cup of chrysanthemum from that pot.
The horse traders told Noni they do not give a fig for her even though they had collected a massive amount of turf from Noni and Noni contributed well beyond money to the lawn of Newtown Darlinghurst and Surry Hills, they said go jump in the lake, if there is a clean one, money counts, they rifled their dinero.
You do not we have the new Tiki you're not in it, go peddle your Holy Kitsch! elsewhere and broke her shingle. Holy wants her shingle returned and emailed Council about a fountain but they said they would rather a mandarin who is besides more fun than Holy Kitsch! and they will instead do a a bad copy as everybody steals concepts from Holy Kitsch! some left the flamingos alone due to John Waters and did not wish to neigh about the ecology. Holy is now eating wagon wheels are they good for health?
The aliens pointed out the horse meat had been laundered and not noticing the chopped mince of their cronies and lack of wild brumbies, Here the laws protect fixing the hurdles are higher than ever.
The tiny aliens felt things had really gone to the pack since last they visited and said well you are on the way to extinction,
Noni does not know which crooks to ask about her proposal for doctorate study in Oz it is considered weak to be a pacifist especially if artista of course the prints had some guns as they were revolutionary and dead, all beware the schmaltz, Holy K. is tired of the kickbacks and buck passing she is already a stray cat. She already tried bribing Charles.
El muséo is fresh she no longer knows who is left to bribe it is on Go Fund Me, will ask some secret people for backing that are not card carrying Far Right Wing followers which oddly in Oz is 90% of Arts movers and shakers at variance to most other developed nations.
Life can be very good. Everybody does not really need an SUV, (there goes the museum backers) Noni is a nervous driver so no longer drives and thinking of starting the Nervous and Erratic Car Non Drivers Club for Non Driving humans so we feel less weird it truly is various for all of us but please stop forcing us to live a life of drear and stinginess. You do not need to pollute rivers and oceans on a global scale to improve happiness we can still trade and have a good planet we are fed up with the money counters, nepotism, planet poisoning and racists and 10 year plans what about now?
PS: Can someone send to Hell all leaf blowers for the awful noise and waste of energy and the person who planted plane trees instead of eucalypts in inner city the hay fever is driving us to pasture